The egg retrieval...

I'm home! It's all done!

The surgery went fine. I started to cry when the nurse was explaining what to do when I walked into the operating room, she said it's a bit intimidating and it was. I gave Pam a hug and saw she was crying too so that got me even more emotional. As we walked into the room the nurse said "Just remember that you are doing something great and helping a couple have a baby!" and I said "I know, and I'm excited but still it's scary!"

Then I laid down on the table and they had me all hooked up with my IV and heart monitor and blood pressure and all that. The Dr said "Ok, I'm giving you the anesthesia now, it's your personal cocktail... maybe a mojito." I said "Nah, how about a Pina Colada?" and they all laughed (there were like 5 people in the room) and then they gave me an oxygen mask and I closed my eyes and the next thing I knew I was back in the recovery room and waving to Pam. She sat down next to me and said "Wow that was so quick."

Less than 20 minutes had past. The nurse asked how I was feeling and I said I was thirsty and kinda felt like I was having cramps. She gave me some pain medication and a juice box. The Dr came over and said I did great and said I told him I was dreaming of eating. LOL! I don't remember that at all but I don't doubt it!! He said they got 23 eggs and from those it looks like 14 are good and will go on to be fertilized. That's a good number, because he said they average about 11.

My heart was fine during the procedure, they said I was a great patient and all my hard work paid off. I said "You guys always make me feel like such a superstar!" and the Dr said "That's because you really are!"

An hour later I got in a wheelchair and we went home. :) Everyone kept thanking me for what I did and said now my job is to take care of myself. The pain is like a slight crampy feeling, but it doesn't go away like cramps do.

But get this- I'm not allowed to drink water!!!! I have to have clear juices or Gatorade, which I hate. It tastes like salt water! And I can't take a bath for 5 DAYS!!!! I'm so upset by that. Showers are fine but no submerging in water. Sucks. Baths are the only thing that makes me feel better!

Although this Vicodin is my new best friend... and I can take 1-2 pills every 4-6 hours. I don't feel any pain at all. They keep warning of feeling nauseous and I have some anti-nausea medication but I feel good right now. I'm under risk of developing Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome, but hopefully if anything I'll only get mild symptoms. The highest risk is 6-8 days from now. Basically, even though they took out the eggs from my follicles, they are now filling up with fluid and will stay enlarged until I get my period in a couple of weeks, which is when I go back to completely normal. The bad part is if they fill up with too much fluid too quickly. But I'm closely monitored and not too worried.

Pam's making me potato soup and it smells SO GOOD. She also bought me a cute basket full of Daisies. I love her. The staff at the clinic was saying that maybe the next time they saw us would be when we're trying for a baby. I can't wait to have children and I'm so glad that I was able to donate my eggs and help a couple have children. The money I received is going straight into an ING account labeled "Baby Fund" for us to use once we start our journey to mommy-hood.

And so my part is done, and those eggs are sitting in the lab maturing for a while until they mix in the intended father's sperm and then in a few days they implant an embryo into the intended mother! And hopefully it sticks and she gets pregnant!! I can't wait to find out.

Ovidrel and waiting for the retrieval

The trigger shot last night was fine, no pain at all.

I have a couple of tiny bruises on my belly from the last couple of injections that kinda hurt.

I had more blood drawn today and then spent the rest of the day at home lounging around. I'm getting much more uncomfortable. The heat these last few days has been awful, I sit on the couch wathing TV and sweat. It's gross.

Pam made a nice healthy dinner of lots of veggies. Plus mashed potatoes, my ultimate comfort food.

I want to go to sleep early. I'm not allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight...including tomorrow morning! Not even a sip of water. Ugh. So I want to go to sleep and wake up and just go right to the clinic.

I'm feeling nervous and anxious and mostly worried about how I'll be acting tomorrow. I don't want to panic and start crying, but I start to tear up thinking about it! I'm worried about the anesthesia and falling asleep, I wish Pam could be with me, and I want her there when I wake up. I don't know when she will be allowed to come see me and that makes me scared.

I am worried about my recovery, and worried about feeling nauseous.

I think I'll just try to sleep now so it'll just be here and I can stop waiting and worrying. I'm still excited but now there is all this reality of what's about to happen.

Estrogen Levels...

The normal estradiol level for women in my age bracket of 20-29 years old is 149.

Throughout this process and after each day of blood work the clinic calls to tell me about my rising levels, which is a good thing.

I remember them saying I was the 400's, and recently it was around 1,300.

I just got a call that I'm at 2,933.

Holy crap!!!! I'm amazed that my body is going through so much and I feel relatively normal.

Well actually, I feel slightly off, tired and a bit yucky in my tummy. I took a nap which is odd, and woke up feeling groggy and hungry but I don't really feel like eating. Which is also odd for me! But I don't feel ANYTHING like I assumed I would. I thought I'd be having mood swings or hot flashes or at least some side effects. But all I get is an occasional slight headache and I can feel my ovaries thumping around which is getting more uncomfortable each time I stand up and walk around!

I'm doing the Ovidrel HCG shot at 11 pm tonight. The egg retrieval will be at 10 am on Monday morning. I'm relieved that I only have one more injection. Even though they don't hurt (Well, these last ones have hurt a bit, I've been feeling it sting when the medication is injected, but the actual needle doesn't hurt) it's been an emotional roller coaster just to get them done! Thank god for Pam who has truly been so amazingly supportive and an awesome nurse!

My heart is ok enough for the egg retrieval!

Yesterday I had the results of my Holter heart monitor read. Sitting in that waiting room was torture. I was on the verge of tears and trying to prepare myself for the worst, all the while trying my best not to stress out. It was awful. Finally the nurse removed the electrodes and put a rush order on the scan.

Then I went into another room and waited for the Dr.

And I waited. And waited. I think about 20 minutes went by. I was actually pacing back and forth for a while. Finally the Dr. came in and he said that I was pretty much ok. Basically, I'm having PVC's, which is ok and very common at some point in most peoples lives. The issue was trying to figure how many I was having and how often. Hence the 24 hour monitoring.

The results came back saying that I have 9,400 PVC's per day, approximately every 10 minutes. Apparently "it was all trigeminy which is likely benign." The Dr. said in a typical heart patient (old with a history of heart problems and symptoms) 10,000 PVC's would be concerning. But since I am young and in every other regard perfectly healthy, he thinks I'll be fine for deep sedation. He wrote "okay for anesthesia from cardiac perspective."

HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF!!!!

He did prescribe a perioperative beta blocker for one week, just to keep my heart happy surrounding the surgery. He also was relieved to hear that it's technically a procedure and not exactly a surgery because I don't get general anesthesia and there are no incisions, so as far as he's concerned there should be no problems.

I went upstairs and gave the fertility clinic the good news, and we made sure I could take the Toprol medication without it interfering.

Today I went in for another ultrasound and more blood tests. And I got super good news. Tonight I give myself the trigger shot of the Human Chorionic Gonadotropin (HCG) and that means I'm all set for the egg retrieval on Monday morning!

This is a picture of my right ovary. The black spots are my enlarged follicles. I forget the exact number, but she was impressed with how many I grew. My left ovary has a lot less, but that's fine. She said I did a great job and now I need to relax at home and take care of my body.


So now I wait for the phone call that will tell me the exact time to do the last shot, and in turn know the exact time the retrieval will be.

It's so egg-citing!

I'm about to go to the cardiologist again to have them evaluate the results that this heart monitor has been recording.

I feel at peace with the fact that I may not get to donate my eggs after all. It saddens me beyond belief, but I always knew there was a slight chance I wouldn't make it to the egg retrieval. All those months ago, signing all those contracts it clearly states that at any time the cycle could be stopped.

I know that this is about my health and well being, and I feel fortunate that everyone is taking that into such consideration.

If I start to think though, I remember the whole reason I signed up in the first place. I wanted to help a complete stranger have a baby. So again, the part that worries me the most is letting her down. Nobody anticipated there would be heart problems associated with this!

I don't know if they've even told her that there are some complications with me. I don't even know if anyone considers it a complication. But the fact is that in a couple hours I will either be cleared for the egg retrieval surgery or we'll have to cancel it completely.

I've been trying so hard to stay calm today. I hope more than anything that the results show that my heart is fine.

But then again, I truly believe that whatever is supposed to happen will, even if it doesn't make sense or isn't what I want.

heart monitor

Well well well.

I went to the cardiologists today. Got to see a really cool ultrasound of my heart. Pam was in the room too and we could see and hear it beating. We could see the valves opening and pushing the blood out.

Apparently it looked good.

Then I had a 12 lead EKG and (first of all, it's EKG or ECG, they are the same but each Dr. calls it whatever they want.) the nurse said it seemed ok.

After that I met with the Dr. and we watched the ultrasound again and he looked over all the results and asked me a bunch of questions. Then he asked what I was there for and I explained I was donating my eggs upstairs and they noticed an irregular heartbeat and referred me here. I said I need clearance before my egg retrieval surgery which is supposed to be this Monday or Tuesday.

He said he can't give me the OK because he didn't have enough time, since everything looked ok, he wants more tests to really check. Then he checked my pulse and said "Ok, I feel it there, but it didn't come up in any tests we've dne yet." So it's coming and going, which he says could be totally normal and no big deal. But he still wanted to have me wait on a list for a heart monitor. He asked if I could call upstairs and ask the fertility clinic if we could push back the surgery a week or two. I just about fell out of the chair. I tried to explain that it's very time sensitive process and didn't work that way.

I started crying, and saying that this is so much bigger than me and that someone was relying on my eggs for their dream to come true and I've been on all these hormone drugs getting my body ready and blah blah blah sniff sniff! And a woman Dr said to hold on, and sure enough a heart monitor was ready at that very moment! What a suspicious miracle. lol.

So she got me all hooked up and I have to wear it for the next 24 hours. This should show how often and when I get the irregular beats, and how long they last. Tomorrow at 3 I bring it in to have the results read, and around 4 the Dr. will be able to see me and hopefully give me good news. I'm crossing my fingers that I'm healthy enough for the retrieval. It's nice that everyone is being so extra careful with my health, but it's also stressing me out a bit.

Doesn't this look like fun?!


Pam fills the syringe with Lupron-


Pam injecting me with Follistim-


My almost full sharps container!


So I guess now I just try to have as much normalcy as possible until I find out what's going on with my heart.

Easier said than done, but I'm trying.

<3

Today was the first day of school. I went to the clinic and had my blood drawn and bruised for the first time. (After about 12 blood draws I'd say that's pretty good!) Then I went to the surgery room and met with the anesthesiologist who was so nice. Everyone at that clinic is amazing, they all make me feel like a million bucks. She had me lay on a bed and hooked me up to an automatic blood pressure machine and put the thingie on my finger and also she put 3 electrodes on my chest to have an ECG.

The machine started beeping and within a few seconds my heart beat pattern printed out.

This is my heartbeat:



This is what a normal heartbeat should look like:



She said I have a heart arrhythmia, which can be totally normal and if there is no history of heart problems it could very well be brought on my stress and anxiety. Both of which I've been experiencing almost nightly due to my injections. Last night I did my Lupron injection with no problem. Then it took me over an hour to do the Follistim injection. I was crying and freaking out and asking Pam for help then yelling at her and telling her to go away and then crying that she left...and after an hour of that we finally had me lay down on the bed and Pam acted like a nurse and just swabbed my belly, pinched, and did it. The second she did it I was fine and back to normal, just sorry for how I had acted. I don't know why sometimes it's so hard for me to do, but as always, the second it's done I'm fine and cursing myself for getting so worked up over nothing.

I'd say that's pretty stressful.

The anesthesiologist also said I was having PVC's, which I looked up:

Premature ventricular contractions (PVCs) are extra, abnormal heartbeats that begin in one of your heart's two lower pumping chambers (ventricles). These extra beats disrupt your regular heart rhythm, which normally starts in the upper right chamber (atrium). As a result, you may feel a flip-flop or skipped beat in your chest. Premature ventricular contractions are very common — they occur in most people at some point.

Why do extra beats occur?
The reasons aren't always clear. Certain triggers, heart diseases or changes in the body can make cells in the ventricles electrically unstable. Underlying heart disease or scarring may also cause electrical impulses to be mis-routed.

Premature ventricular contractions may be associated with:
Chemical changes or imbalances in the body
Certain medications, including common asthma medications
Alcohol or illegal drugs
Increased levels of adrenaline in the body, caused by caffeine, exercise or anxiety
Injury to the heart muscle from coronary artery disease, congenital heart disease, high blood pressure or infections (myocarditis)

So we're hoping it's not an underlying heart problem but just from stress.

I have to get more blood drawn and an ultrasound tomorrow morning, then at 3 I go back to the hospital and meet with a cardiologist to have some more tests done. This time I'll have a 12 electrodes placed on my body, and then I'll get an Echocardiogram.

Echocardiogram: A hand-held device (transducer) placed on your chest uses sound waves to produce images of your heart's size, structure and motion.

If they still need more data, I might have to wear a heart monitor for 24 hours so they can record at what point my heartbeat does what. I started to cry when the anesthesiologist was telling me I had to see a heart doctor. I explained that I don't have health insurance, but it turns out that this falls under the coverage of the plan that the intended parents were required to take for me. So I guess that means they get billed for this, which makes my heart a little sad to think about.

Now. The doctors have been calling me all day to set up this appointment and ask health history questions and all sorts of stuff. But the one thing they keep saying is to calm down and don't stress out.

And I just happened to have one of my most stressful days at work ever...my schedule is all screwy and I was so upset and kept crying. I'm emotional to begin with, but I'm wondering if I'm extra emotional due to the hormones. Either way, it was a crappy day because I found out I don't have the position I've had for the last 3 years...instead I'm going to have to spilt my time all over the place, and after all that I'm still not elegible for benefits!!

The good thing (well, I don't know if it's actually good but I've been waiting for it!) is that I finally for the first time feel something in my ovaries!! As much as the heart thing worries me, I keep thinking it can't be THAT awful if they are still saying to go ahead and stay on track for the egg donation.

The anesthesiologist even said that the next time she'd see me it would be for the retrieval surgery. So that's awesome. Apparently they aren't too alarmed, and are just being extra cautious for my own safety, which makes me feel really good.

When I walk I feel a dull thud in my lower stomach, on alternating sides and with each step. I can only imagine it's my growing follicles that are enlarging my ovaries and I'm so glad I can feel it! It's supposed to get pretty uncomfortable in a few days, I'm 6 days away from the surgery and by then I should be ready for them to take the eggies out!

Right now it's not bad at all, in fact I feel pretty good considering everything.